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baby jokes aren't funny
May. 12th, 2012 12:20 pmIt is hard to know how much it is reasonable to anthropomorphize the baby.
I mean, yes he is a little human being. But on the other hand no he's not. He doesn't do things for human reasons, he does things for his own baby reasons, he has baby reactions. He doesn't think of me as "his mother" in the same way that I think of my mother, I am something different. But he is becoming a human. At some point it will be accurate to ascribe normal human motivations to him.
The other day he finished nursing, looked me in the eye, took my nipple between his teeth - he has teeth on the bottom AND TOP now - bit me, and grinned. Because it's funny. Baby joke! I did what I do on these occasions, which is: yelp in pain, angrily say DO NOT BITE MAMA, put the baby down someplace safe, and leave the room for two minutes while he cries and cries. I put him down in his crib, and I did it roughly: I think I actually dropped him half an inch or so. It scared him. It brought home to me just how vulnerable he is: if I want him to go in his crib, in his crib he goes. He can cry and writhe all he wants: there is nothing he can do about it. In his crib he went and out the door I went, and Mr. E, who had gotten home while I was nursing him, talked me down because I was extremely upset. We waited a minute and a half and then he offered to go get the baby. And I said we'd both go, because I didn't want to be mad at the baby. I wanted to make it up. Was I anthropomorphizing? Does the baby understand that I'm mad at him? We went in the room. The baby was frantic. I picked him up, and he stopped crying. I hugged him and told him I wasn't mad at him anymore.
I gave him to Mr. E, who hadn't seen him yet that evening, and...he started crying again. Normally, and again since then, if he's hungry he keeps laserlike focus on me; but if he's not, he likes me and Mr. E equally, and does not prefer one of us holding him over the other. And he wasn't hungry then, because I had just finished nursing him. But he cried until Mr. E gave him back, and quieted when I held him. It really seemed as if he knew that I had been upset with him and wanted to be reassured that he and I were okay now. So I told him we were and held him for a while.
It's fascinating. I wish I knew what was going on in his little head!
I mean, yes he is a little human being. But on the other hand no he's not. He doesn't do things for human reasons, he does things for his own baby reasons, he has baby reactions. He doesn't think of me as "his mother" in the same way that I think of my mother, I am something different. But he is becoming a human. At some point it will be accurate to ascribe normal human motivations to him.
The other day he finished nursing, looked me in the eye, took my nipple between his teeth - he has teeth on the bottom AND TOP now - bit me, and grinned. Because it's funny. Baby joke! I did what I do on these occasions, which is: yelp in pain, angrily say DO NOT BITE MAMA, put the baby down someplace safe, and leave the room for two minutes while he cries and cries. I put him down in his crib, and I did it roughly: I think I actually dropped him half an inch or so. It scared him. It brought home to me just how vulnerable he is: if I want him to go in his crib, in his crib he goes. He can cry and writhe all he wants: there is nothing he can do about it. In his crib he went and out the door I went, and Mr. E, who had gotten home while I was nursing him, talked me down because I was extremely upset. We waited a minute and a half and then he offered to go get the baby. And I said we'd both go, because I didn't want to be mad at the baby. I wanted to make it up. Was I anthropomorphizing? Does the baby understand that I'm mad at him? We went in the room. The baby was frantic. I picked him up, and he stopped crying. I hugged him and told him I wasn't mad at him anymore.
I gave him to Mr. E, who hadn't seen him yet that evening, and...he started crying again. Normally, and again since then, if he's hungry he keeps laserlike focus on me; but if he's not, he likes me and Mr. E equally, and does not prefer one of us holding him over the other. And he wasn't hungry then, because I had just finished nursing him. But he cried until Mr. E gave him back, and quieted when I held him. It really seemed as if he knew that I had been upset with him and wanted to be reassured that he and I were okay now. So I told him we were and held him for a while.
It's fascinating. I wish I knew what was going on in his little head!
