girl things

[metaphortunate]

I've been feeling surprisingly interested in being more femme lately!

I mean, I guess in a way it's not surprising, and that way is that I get bored very easily. My hairdresser mentioned last time I saw him that I've probably had eight different hairstyles in the time he's been cutting my hair where most of his other clients have had one or two. Other stuff that might be going on:

1) I pooped out a baby! And now I am feeding him from my boobs! I am pretty sure that somewhere in my brain biological determinism is going "huh, now we are a mama...I guess we should step up our female game?"

2) I have been reading sparkymonster and her cronies geek out about fabulous eyeshadow and such over Twitter and, you know, it sounds like fun! I mean, I have always liked costume and elaborate clothes. I wear a lot of hats!. See above re: inconstancy, I have had more butch periods and more femme periods in my life, but if I had to pick my favorite overall gender presentation or the one that has appealed to me most throughout my life, I would have to say: foppish. If I could choose what I would look like it would probably be Adam Ant. Oh, sorry, under-35s: like Captain Jack Sparrow, but with fewer bodily parasites.

3) I've been feeling ugly, and lord knows that the fastest way for me to get some strokes for my appearance is to conform more to gender rules. And it would be so much easier to be more femmey. (In some ways. In other ways, it's so nice to have stuff that I just handwave and say "that does not apply to me because of my gender presentation, thank you." Things like leg depilation. I would have to deal with that again, and damn is that not appealing.)

4) It might be as simple as the fact that I am growing out my hair, actually.

But see, there's just one of the many problems with this idea: the whole reason I am growing out my hair is that short hair only looks good if you get it cut regularly, and it's much harder to get the time to do that right now, so I thought I'd try to get a haircut that would be more forgiving! I have no time! It's not a good point in my life to get curious about makeup! If I have ten minutes that I could spend zerberting the baby, or sleeping, or fucking around on the internet, or reading, or drawing on my eyelids: YOU LOSE, EYELIDS.

I don't know. I have a wedding to go to this month, and then there are holiday parties, and I need something to wear, because none of my pre-pregnancy tops fit right anymore...maybe I will buy a dress and see how it goes? Igigi is a good place to buy dresses, right? Fatshionistas, help me out - where should I be looking? Also, shit, if I wear a dress, I'll need a purse, right? They don't have pockets? Where's a good place to get a purse from?

Comments

[wendelah1]

Here via the network. IGIGI is a great place to look for dresses. For internet shopping, I like Nordstrom (free shipping, free returns) and Bloomingdales (small but well-chosen selection), too. Lately, I've had great luck with size XL at Anthropologie. I'm 5'8" and 200 pounds, 38C, and wear a size 1X usually. EBAY is a great place to snap up bargains if you know your size and brand, since most sellers don't take returns.

I'm heterosexual and married, very into clothes and fashion, and I don't shave my legs. To be fair, I don't have much hair. You could wear a maxidress or wear opaque tights. Leggings. There are options.

[metaphortunate]

Thank you for the suggestions! I think free returns is going to be vitally important here.

[resolute]

For inspiration I would follow Scrapscallion on Tumblr, and Red Carpet Superhero's Everyday Superhero posts. These are people who are thinking about fashion, and geek, and somewhat about gender, and who are trying to live busy lives at the same time.

[rydra_wong]

Thank you so much for the heads-up re: Scrapscallion!

I don't have a Tumblr, but I made scrapscallion_feed.

[metaphortunate]

Holy cats, those are cool. Scrapscallion's stuff is aspirational, though; I will not be spending $300 on a dress and even if I would I am too fat, no designer on her feed would sell me one.

[sparkymonster]

Dresses!
I like Eliza Parker (http://elizaparker.com/) and Kiyonna (http://www.kiyonna.com) quite a bit.

I don't mind shaving my legs but I will tell you a secret. If you wear tights, you never need to shave! Also your legs can be bright crazy colors.

You would be an amazing Adam Ant type person. Though he seemed to spend a lot of time drawing on his face. But still. You could have epaulets on everything which would rock.

[metaphortunate]

Epaulets are indeed the shit! & thank you for the encouragement. :)

[badgerbag]

Tights are so awesome. I have some black ones with silver stars ... But haven't worn a skirt in 5 years.

http://www.sockdreams.com/products/tights for the tights!!!!

Also, in agreement with William Shatner, I recommend MAC lipstick.

[serene]

I do femme with leg hair and without makeup. Just saying. Femme hippy, I guess.

[phi]

And I do not quite butch but definitely not!femme with makeup and sparkly earrings all the time! There are options!

[metaphortunate]

This is true! I should not be so binary about it.

[brownbetty]

Your post came at a point when I remembered that I have this Jessica Rabbit dress (Persons under 30: …IDEK, read sheath?) and tried it on, and was like, “I look amazing! Also, like Chewbacca. I need to shave pits and legs if I want to wear this thing in public.”

So, yeah. Tights save on depilating, but I know nothing to save on underarm, except don't wear things that show your pits.

[metaphortunate]

Heh.

Actually I do shave my pits b/c 1) it has a deodorizing effect & 2) the stubble is not as annoying as leg stubble. I have the kind of leg hair where I would need to shave it twice a day to fully avoid prickliness. :(

[sparkymonster]

"but this tumblr is the best thing ever, go read it if you are interested in goofy and/or robot-fighting fashion."
http://scrapscallion.tumblr.com/

[rydra_wong]

A comm that might be relevant to your interests, and that needs more love:

nerdpunk

[badgerbag]

Ooooh! This is relevant to my interests!!!!

[rydra_wong]

\o/ It is a comm that deserves more posting and promotion, I feel.