parent advice: playing favorites

[metaphortunate]

Alas. I fear it can no longer be denied. After two blessed years of the Junebug being equally fond of both parents, dammit, he has decided to pick a favorite.

I am personally convinced that this is sheer fuckery motivated by the desire to demand that the 7.5-month pregnant woman be the one to haul his nearly 30-lb butt up the stairs several times a day, despite the presence nearby of a perfectly good daddy, plus obviously my enormous and fragile belly is the one he needs to jump on during weekend mornings when we get to laze about in bed for a few minutes. But it's no fun for Mr. E either; as he says, how come you get the cuddles and I get to unclog the toilet?

Have y'all dealt with this? Has it been temporary? Has it switched back and forth? Any advice?

Comments

[cahn]

I wonder if, a little, it's because the Junebug spends more time with Mr. E. My husband has almost always been E's favorite, but recently I've had to work a lot, and she's been spending more time with her dad, and suddenly I'm the new favorite...

We've dealt with her clear preference for daddy, but the fact that I do most of the childcare, by using "special daddy time" as a motivating force. Yes, you have to clean up toys and have bath and brush teeth and change into pajamas with mommy, who is not your first choice (D is usually working during that time)... but once you do that, you get special daddy time! (Usually fifteen minutes spent at the computer -- D has little math/geometry animations that he likes to show E.) But not until you do all those things with mommy.

(We also, when she's being obnoxious, just kind of insist on the parent. Yes, you're kicking and screaming for Daddy. Too bad, it's Mommy who's more convenient, kiddo, and you just have to suck it up. Or vice versa, though I think that's only happened once.)

But we haven't dealt with the second-kid issue, so I think we've had it easy -- I have no idea how she'd handle that.