microaggressions

[metaphortunate]

On the bus home after work tonight: me. A little boy sitting next to me. His brother sitting next to him. His sister, a little chubby with glasses, third on the bus, too late to get a seat, standing in front of them, swinging a little on the pole she was holding on to. Sister maybe 7 or 8, one brother older, one younger. Kids talking.

Sister mentions that she's good at soccer.

Older brother says "No you're not. You suck."

Sister tries to meet him halfway. "I'm sort of good. Maybe I sort of suck."

Older brother: "No, you suck."

Sister: "You know [other kid]? I got a goal off him today. I made a goal."

Older brother pauses. "He probably let you."

Older brother: "Boys like to let girls win. They just pretend like you won."

Me, leaning in: "No they don't. Boys hate it when it looks like girls beat them."

Older brother: "Oh yeah….that's true."

Me: [trying not to look too smug]

Kids: silent for a few minutes, while I pull out my phone and ostentatiously perform Not Listening To Your Conversation Anymore, Please Go About Your Business.

Sister: smiling a little.

------


Mr. E says I used sexism against sexism. Like judo or something? Or just another ultimately self-defeating master's tool?

Comments

[merielle]

But I don't think that's what you did. You said that boys hate it. You didn't say it was cool or right that they feel that way. You left it open to her interpretation, which leaves the power in her hands, you provided an example of a woman arguing against a male assertion and winning the argument, and you showed grownup woman/girl solidarity. All that is awesome!

I guess you could have said something like, "In my experience, boys usually hate it when it looks like girls beat them, and I don't think it should actually matter," but whatever. You were pithy and in the moment, and kids stop paying attention if you get too wordy. So overall, IMO, fucking rad. Well played.

[metaphortunate]

They do, you have to keep it short. And thanks. :)