metaphortunate son (
metaphortunate) wrote2013-04-11 10:05 pm
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Junebug joys
Thank you everyone!
I note that I am getting congrats in 2 flavors:
1) Yay, how awesome!
2) Congrats! ….huh, didn't really expect that, but…you seem happy, so congrats!
Nobody apologize! There is nothing wrong with that. But it leads me to believe that maybe I have been venting too much and not celebrating the Junebug's awesomeness enough. Don't get me wrong, there is plenty to vent about. He's a toddler. I could complain all day and all night except that I will be passing out in about half an hour. But there is also lots, lots, lots to be in love with, and I don't think it's good to only talk about the bad aspects of the people you love. So let me assure you that, wigglemonster as he is, when I ride the bus home with him in my lap I often look around & think, "Huh, I'm the only one smiling," and then think, "That's because I'm the only one holding the very best monkey in the whole world." I love his nose kisses and the way he says "Yeah!" and the way his whole body wiggles in a million directions when he runs and how he has to announce that he's "Wunning! Wunning!" I love how he's learning to climb and picking up new words every day and being brave going down slides and asking for songs and sharing his blueberries with me and going "Yay!" when I eat one.
The other day, at work, I had a pounding headache - I don't usually get headaches but I got them last pregnancy and now I am getting them again. Left work to pick the Junebug up, headache on the train. Picked him up at daycare, hugged him, took him home on the bus…and by the time we got home, my headache was gone. Mr. E said that it was because I wasn't at work anymore - but after I put him to bed, the headache came back. It just feels good to be around him. I mean, it also feels good to get a break, don't get me wrong. I look forward to all the things I get done when he's asleep or otherwise being taken care of. But I am profoundly satisfied when I am holding my little guy.
I note that I am getting congrats in 2 flavors:
1) Yay, how awesome!
2) Congrats! ….huh, didn't really expect that, but…you seem happy, so congrats!
Nobody apologize! There is nothing wrong with that. But it leads me to believe that maybe I have been venting too much and not celebrating the Junebug's awesomeness enough. Don't get me wrong, there is plenty to vent about. He's a toddler. I could complain all day and all night except that I will be passing out in about half an hour. But there is also lots, lots, lots to be in love with, and I don't think it's good to only talk about the bad aspects of the people you love. So let me assure you that, wigglemonster as he is, when I ride the bus home with him in my lap I often look around & think, "Huh, I'm the only one smiling," and then think, "That's because I'm the only one holding the very best monkey in the whole world." I love his nose kisses and the way he says "Yeah!" and the way his whole body wiggles in a million directions when he runs and how he has to announce that he's "Wunning! Wunning!" I love how he's learning to climb and picking up new words every day and being brave going down slides and asking for songs and sharing his blueberries with me and going "Yay!" when I eat one.
The other day, at work, I had a pounding headache - I don't usually get headaches but I got them last pregnancy and now I am getting them again. Left work to pick the Junebug up, headache on the train. Picked him up at daycare, hugged him, took him home on the bus…and by the time we got home, my headache was gone. Mr. E said that it was because I wasn't at work anymore - but after I put him to bed, the headache came back. It just feels good to be around him. I mean, it also feels good to get a break, don't get me wrong. I look forward to all the things I get done when he's asleep or otherwise being taken care of. But I am profoundly satisfied when I am holding my little guy.
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I put off having a second child for nearly 4 years because I wanted all that time alone with my first, because I was afraid I'd never love the second baby as much as I did my first, and because I didn't want to make my first child feel bad about a new baby. We finally decided to have a second child and I got to experience love that didn't diminish but expanded separately so that I loved each them for themselves and had different experiences of them.
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Yes, I would really like to have more time with my first as an only...but I am already hell of old to be doing this. :/ It was now or never.
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