kids make you lonely

[metaphortunate]

You know, mostly people did tell me that it was going to be exactly this hard. I can't pretend I wasn't warned. But there's just one thing that I don't think anybody mentioned? I constantly have that "all my friends are out having fun without me" feeling. And the reason is because y'all ARE. You post pictures about it! And I see these pictures and go "oh…they were here and they didn't invite me…and if they had, what day was that, that was…yeah, no way I could have gone…they probably guessed that…I can't really argue."

Or, you know, you DO ask me, and I can't go, and then you go out and have fun without me, and then I do the sad puppy eyes when looking at your pictures later.

Argh, it's not that I am not socializing enough! I have as much social time as I can handle and maybe just a bit more. I just have a lot of great friends who do really fun things, okay? I wish I got to see you more, it's just that I would need a time turner.

Comments

[the_rck]

Well, we've been friends since college. We met in 1986 when we both went to a play a long way away from our dorm and walked back together after so that neither of us had to be alone in the dark. We'd seen each other around but hadn't ever introduced ourselves before. She stood up in our wedding, and we stood up at hers. That meant that there were decades of history before the problem and that our husbands were still friends.

I think it just never occurred to her that having a small child completely alters one's priorities. At this point, her daughter is about 23 months, so she's been dealing with the very intensive parenting stuff. They adopted a safe surrender baby with pretty much no notice, just a phone call saying, "There's a baby. You can take her home tomorrow if you want her." So her life got upended without the more usual months of planning and figuring things out. They'd been trying to adopt for years, but having it suddenly actually happen, well.