I just...wow, ok. I mean, I was speculating it's their mindset around housework that's perhaps biological, not their actual day-to-day performance, so I'm sorry if I didn't make that more clear. My ex who did not clean with the mom who did it all? Was the cleanest, neatest, most organized thing you ever saw - at his job - which I only found out seven or eight years into our relationship when he took me to his work one day and I watched him being the very opposite of the disorganized and rather dirt-blind person he was at the house. It stunned me, watching him do what he did in a way that showed it was not only routine but simply automatic (he did it really well, too!), but it didn't change the fact that how much he cared was based solely on how much money he'd earn for it and no more.

So I suppose if I'd paid him $5 for every load of dishes/time he ran the vacuum for me/time I realized the bathtub was about to crawl away on feet not its own that a) I'd go broke fast and b) he'd make out like a bandit because money motivated him to do what he was well capable of doing just as well or better than me but did not do at home unless I literally (well, almost) lit some sort of verbal fire under his ass.

I hope you and others here won't mistake, or haven't already mistaken, my take on this issue - which was really no more than quick and instinctive - as me trying to roll out some edict or have everyone (anyone, even!) automatically react with any form of agreement. I was not seeking agreement nor disagreement so much as stating what I see as more than just a mere coincidence of similar behaviors spread across my lifetime of experience dealing with various men, so it was more like me "just making small talk"; I meant my speculation on the possible cause of what drives some men to look at housework, in particular, the way they do in no mean or harmful way.