metaphortunate son (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
metaphortunate) wrote2011-12-30 09:22 pm
metaphortunate) wrote2011-12-30 09:22 pm
Home!
I'm home!
I think I'm just done going back to Texas for Christmas. Traveling during the winter holidays is shit. It would be nice to go during a different time of year. Spring, when the wildflowers are in season. Summer, when we could meet up with my friend and take all the kids to the water park or the beach or something. There are options. And the thing about the holidays is, not only is the traveling shit, but everyone is busy and hopped up on holiday madness. It would be nice to visit some time when we'd be the only game in town.
As I mentioned before, it's something else how seamlessly things have slid from "you don't understand because you're not a parent" to "you don't understand because you're not a grandparent." And the thing is, I do understand. It must be extremely frustrating to be introduced to this adorable new baby whom you love madly and yet you have no control over how he's raised or how anything is done for him. And yet, tough. We had a bit of a conversation about that that ended sort of like this:
MOM: It's just that you're so very young -
ME: Uh, Mom, no. I am thirty-seven. That is not young. That is, in fact, just about as old as it is possible to even have a kid.
MOM: Well, you're very young to me.
ME: Mom. I am almost middle-aged.
MOM: Middle-aged! Then what am I?
ME: You are old.
Way to not make any peace there, me!
Still, Mom had a fantastic time with the Junebug, and he had a fantastic time with her. I know he doesn't really know people at this point, much less be able to miss them as people, but there are times here at home when Mr. E and I are busy or tired or doing things and he is sitting or lying on his own, and at those times, my mom was overjoyed to be playing with him, and he was happy. I don't think he's old enough to miss that exactly but I know he was happier because she was there. And that makes me a little sad now that we're home.
I got to learn some goofy baby games - oh, you know, things like This Little Piggy - from the old country! Ones that my parents played with me only I don't remember because I was a baby! They helped on the plane, too. Ooh, also I found this book of kids' stories and poems that I grew up with and I don't know why my mom kept but she did and I'm so happy because I loved it and now I get to read it to the Junebug!
I feel mildly sorry for my bro's gf, only mildly because she's a huge bitch, but unless I am projecting like an IMAX I recognize the position she's in. She and my brother were there the afternoon we showed up with the Junebug and she did NOT want to hold him - straight up said, "I don't like holding babies" - and I tried to say that she didn't have to but Mom and Bro made her. If I am reading the situation right she has absolutely no idea whether or not she likes babies because she is terrified that if she ever expresses any emotion other than loathing towards babies she will never hear anything else for the rest of her born days other than that she needs to have babies or, eventually, what a shame it is that she didn't have babies. I do not blame her at all for having the Baby Repulsor Force Field up at full strength. However, at the point that she gets cranky because she has to watch my brother play with his new nephew, that is when my sympathy begins to wane. Also it was really funny how when I started nursing the kid and my mom took a picture of us she freaked out and they had to leave.
We went out to dinner with bro and her family and my god that could be a whole saga in itself but I will confine myself to saying that the Junebug was awesomeness itself throughout the entire surprisingly long, exhausting evening, remaining cute and fun, barely crying; and even though we truthfully said that it was none of our doing and he was just born with this chill temperament, I know, and I took a great deal of petty pleasure in the fact that, he made us look good. Especially compared to the previous baby in their family who was a tiny freakshow.
My god, the nursing thing. Bro's gf freaking out. My mom and everyone telling me that I'm feeding him too much. My mom trying to convince me to go feed him in the bathroom while we were out at dinner. My mom and all her friends also telling me that I'm such a devoted, self-sacrificing mother to still be nursing him at six months. Various of mom's friends justifying to me why they weren't able to nurse their kids for more than a month (dude, I believe you! I am not judging! I don't even care! Also, your kids are forty, at this point NO ONE cares!)
Did get to see a bunch of my friends, which was completely lovely, including an evening with a friend of mine and her wife who is currently pregnant with twins and it was just a complete orgy of talking about babies and soooo fun and satisfying. I am very jealous of their baby room. It's so lovely. However, I have realized why we don't have a lovely decorated painted baby room. It's because we don't have a lovely decorated house or lifestyle. We put our time into other things. That's a choice and that's fine. Or rather it's been fine but it's been starting to bug me, the mess in our house. I don't need to have a Decorated house but I do need to make the condition of my living space more of a priority. It's not exactly a resolution but that's my New Goal of 2012, to find a compromise between tidiness and attractive house and time spent that both Mr. E and I can be happy with.
I think I'm just done going back to Texas for Christmas. Traveling during the winter holidays is shit. It would be nice to go during a different time of year. Spring, when the wildflowers are in season. Summer, when we could meet up with my friend and take all the kids to the water park or the beach or something. There are options. And the thing about the holidays is, not only is the traveling shit, but everyone is busy and hopped up on holiday madness. It would be nice to visit some time when we'd be the only game in town.
As I mentioned before, it's something else how seamlessly things have slid from "you don't understand because you're not a parent" to "you don't understand because you're not a grandparent." And the thing is, I do understand. It must be extremely frustrating to be introduced to this adorable new baby whom you love madly and yet you have no control over how he's raised or how anything is done for him. And yet, tough. We had a bit of a conversation about that that ended sort of like this:
MOM: It's just that you're so very young -
ME: Uh, Mom, no. I am thirty-seven. That is not young. That is, in fact, just about as old as it is possible to even have a kid.
MOM: Well, you're very young to me.
ME: Mom. I am almost middle-aged.
MOM: Middle-aged! Then what am I?
ME: You are old.
Way to not make any peace there, me!
Still, Mom had a fantastic time with the Junebug, and he had a fantastic time with her. I know he doesn't really know people at this point, much less be able to miss them as people, but there are times here at home when Mr. E and I are busy or tired or doing things and he is sitting or lying on his own, and at those times, my mom was overjoyed to be playing with him, and he was happy. I don't think he's old enough to miss that exactly but I know he was happier because she was there. And that makes me a little sad now that we're home.
I got to learn some goofy baby games - oh, you know, things like This Little Piggy - from the old country! Ones that my parents played with me only I don't remember because I was a baby! They helped on the plane, too. Ooh, also I found this book of kids' stories and poems that I grew up with and I don't know why my mom kept but she did and I'm so happy because I loved it and now I get to read it to the Junebug!
I feel mildly sorry for my bro's gf, only mildly because she's a huge bitch, but unless I am projecting like an IMAX I recognize the position she's in. She and my brother were there the afternoon we showed up with the Junebug and she did NOT want to hold him - straight up said, "I don't like holding babies" - and I tried to say that she didn't have to but Mom and Bro made her. If I am reading the situation right she has absolutely no idea whether or not she likes babies because she is terrified that if she ever expresses any emotion other than loathing towards babies she will never hear anything else for the rest of her born days other than that she needs to have babies or, eventually, what a shame it is that she didn't have babies. I do not blame her at all for having the Baby Repulsor Force Field up at full strength. However, at the point that she gets cranky because she has to watch my brother play with his new nephew, that is when my sympathy begins to wane. Also it was really funny how when I started nursing the kid and my mom took a picture of us she freaked out and they had to leave.
We went out to dinner with bro and her family and my god that could be a whole saga in itself but I will confine myself to saying that the Junebug was awesomeness itself throughout the entire surprisingly long, exhausting evening, remaining cute and fun, barely crying; and even though we truthfully said that it was none of our doing and he was just born with this chill temperament, I know, and I took a great deal of petty pleasure in the fact that, he made us look good. Especially compared to the previous baby in their family who was a tiny freakshow.
My god, the nursing thing. Bro's gf freaking out. My mom and everyone telling me that I'm feeding him too much. My mom trying to convince me to go feed him in the bathroom while we were out at dinner. My mom and all her friends also telling me that I'm such a devoted, self-sacrificing mother to still be nursing him at six months. Various of mom's friends justifying to me why they weren't able to nurse their kids for more than a month (dude, I believe you! I am not judging! I don't even care! Also, your kids are forty, at this point NO ONE cares!)
Did get to see a bunch of my friends, which was completely lovely, including an evening with a friend of mine and her wife who is currently pregnant with twins and it was just a complete orgy of talking about babies and soooo fun and satisfying. I am very jealous of their baby room. It's so lovely. However, I have realized why we don't have a lovely decorated painted baby room. It's because we don't have a lovely decorated house or lifestyle. We put our time into other things. That's a choice and that's fine. Or rather it's been fine but it's been starting to bug me, the mess in our house. I don't need to have a Decorated house but I do need to make the condition of my living space more of a priority. It's not exactly a resolution but that's my New Goal of 2012, to find a compromise between tidiness and attractive house and time spent that both Mr. E and I can be happy with.