metaphortunate son (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
metaphortunate) wrote2011-12-22 11:06 pm
metaphortunate) wrote2011-12-22 11:06 pm
Entry tags:
performing femininity
I own a purse, two skirts, and a dress! And I have been wearing them! I have leveled up in Girl.
I got my skirts from Effie's Heart. They only go up to size XL (about a 14-16?) but if you can fit into that, they have some nice stuff. And sales. I got this skirt for a total of $18 with discount!
A-line skirts are nice because if they're at least knee-length then no one is seeing your underwear no matter how you sit. Unfortunately they are just not as warm as pants. On the other hand, if you have tights that fit, then my GOD they are comfy.
When I decided to get a purse I started looking around at people's bags and it's one of those things that I never noticed before but when I started thinking about it, wow, people carry a lot of bags. Well, probably a lot of it is also that I walk around and use public transport. Drivers probably just haul shit around in their cars. But people walking around need all kinds of bags. You know what's amazing to me? Women who carry around purses so big that they could have a purse dog in there and no one would ever know except that their purse dog could be a German Shepherd. If I were carrying around one of those purses I would be all leaning to the side and huffing and puffing. But they're just casually swinging it along with the other bag they're probably carrying. They clearly carry that purse every single day, they're so used to it. What do they have in there? What 3 cubic meters of stuff do you need with you every single day?
So I've been thinking more about makeup, on account of stuff like this. And I go back to, if you dress butch then not wearing makeup is a no-brainer; makeup isn't very butch. But if you dress femme and don't wear makeup, then do you look like you're too hippie to or not organized enough to? Of course, Corporette is a blog for lawyers; my workplace is much more casual. But on the third hand, I got called "young lady" the other day. In a joking manner, but still - I'm about to be 37. That ain't right. Anyway, I haven't started wearing makeup, but I thought I'd do some research in case I decided I wanted to. So I googled "minimal makeup". What I found was articles on how the no makeup look is the hot look right now and how to achieve it for which you will apparently need three separate types of concealer. THE POINT, YOU HAVE MISSED IT.
Good things about wearing a purse: you don't have to keep transferring shit between your pockets; much less chance of accidentally running chapstick through the wash with your clothes; when going through security such as at the airport or, just to pick a random example, when spending the day with your tiny son at the emergency passport center (long story), it is much easier to just throw a purse on the conveyor belt than it is to dig every last random penny and scrap of lint out of your various pockets.
Bad things about wearing a purse: you don't. That is, you wear it when you're out, but you don't wear it around the house or the office. This is really awkward! I keep my lip gloss in my purse now, but now that means I don't have it with me every time I go to the bathroom, which means my lips are all chapped because I don't have the opportunity to reapply it when I go to the bathroom! And what about having your phone around? Do you just not answer your cell phone when you're at home cause you can't hear it cause it's in the other room in your purse? When you're stuck in the bathroom, do you just read shampoo bottles like it's 1998? Skirt-wearing people who are used to not having pockets: how do you deal with this? You have to wear a watch still, right?
I got my skirts from Effie's Heart. They only go up to size XL (about a 14-16?) but if you can fit into that, they have some nice stuff. And sales. I got this skirt for a total of $18 with discount!
A-line skirts are nice because if they're at least knee-length then no one is seeing your underwear no matter how you sit. Unfortunately they are just not as warm as pants. On the other hand, if you have tights that fit, then my GOD they are comfy.
When I decided to get a purse I started looking around at people's bags and it's one of those things that I never noticed before but when I started thinking about it, wow, people carry a lot of bags. Well, probably a lot of it is also that I walk around and use public transport. Drivers probably just haul shit around in their cars. But people walking around need all kinds of bags. You know what's amazing to me? Women who carry around purses so big that they could have a purse dog in there and no one would ever know except that their purse dog could be a German Shepherd. If I were carrying around one of those purses I would be all leaning to the side and huffing and puffing. But they're just casually swinging it along with the other bag they're probably carrying. They clearly carry that purse every single day, they're so used to it. What do they have in there? What 3 cubic meters of stuff do you need with you every single day?
So I've been thinking more about makeup, on account of stuff like this. And I go back to, if you dress butch then not wearing makeup is a no-brainer; makeup isn't very butch. But if you dress femme and don't wear makeup, then do you look like you're too hippie to or not organized enough to? Of course, Corporette is a blog for lawyers; my workplace is much more casual. But on the third hand, I got called "young lady" the other day. In a joking manner, but still - I'm about to be 37. That ain't right. Anyway, I haven't started wearing makeup, but I thought I'd do some research in case I decided I wanted to. So I googled "minimal makeup". What I found was articles on how the no makeup look is the hot look right now and how to achieve it for which you will apparently need three separate types of concealer. THE POINT, YOU HAVE MISSED IT.
Good things about wearing a purse: you don't have to keep transferring shit between your pockets; much less chance of accidentally running chapstick through the wash with your clothes; when going through security such as at the airport or, just to pick a random example, when spending the day with your tiny son at the emergency passport center (long story), it is much easier to just throw a purse on the conveyor belt than it is to dig every last random penny and scrap of lint out of your various pockets.
Bad things about wearing a purse: you don't. That is, you wear it when you're out, but you don't wear it around the house or the office. This is really awkward! I keep my lip gloss in my purse now, but now that means I don't have it with me every time I go to the bathroom, which means my lips are all chapped because I don't have the opportunity to reapply it when I go to the bathroom! And what about having your phone around? Do you just not answer your cell phone when you're at home cause you can't hear it cause it's in the other room in your purse? When you're stuck in the bathroom, do you just read shampoo bottles like it's 1998? Skirt-wearing people who are used to not having pockets: how do you deal with this? You have to wear a watch still, right?
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If I wear lipstick, it will be red! And I will shellack it onto my lips; it will not MOVE. If I wear eyeliner damn right it will be a thick black line or plum line or whatever colour I feel like line. I want people to know it's there; I want my eyes to be framed! And mascara? Heck yes I love mascara! Let's ladle that on some!
tl;dr I regard makeup, when I don't have to wear it for business drag, as fingerpainting on my face. And I don't fingerpaint with neutrals.
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I hope you're enjoying your new femme'd out look! You should post pics. :D
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(I also prefer purses I can hang from my shoulder easily -- so, long sturdy handles --, so I can "wear" them. But I also keep my work ID and transit pass in a little tether attached to my purse, that I can disattach and carry/wear for short trips around the workplace.)
For chapstick/lipstick reapplication, there are cheap lipstick cases that come with a tiny mirror, so you don't have to be in the bathroom to reapply. Although honestly, I do chapstick blind, and almost never wear makeup. But I have a mirror in case I need one!! (Also a Leatherman multi-tool, because I'm not that feminine.)
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Yeah, I got nuthin'.
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I loathe purses. LOATHE. I have two backpacks: a frumpy one for my gym stuff, which I bring on workout days, and a leather one styled nicely enough to be a purse, which I carry if I absolutely must have a bag. I have a teeny beaded clutch for Occasions, which gets trotted out maybe once every two years. Otherwise, I am all about pockets. It helps that I don't need to carry much stuff: iPod, earbuds, wallet (a "man's" wallet), keys, chapstick, hanky, done. Whatever book I'm reading usually goes in the handled paper bag I carry my lunch in. ::shrug::
I gave up makeup 15 years ago and never looked back. It's fun to have it available for drag or a mask, and of course I do wear it on job interviews (grumbling all the way). But other than that, I feel just fine in a dashing professional ensemble without any makeup at all. IMO we are lucky on the west coast -- this is an acceptable look now to all except the most corporate types.
i think of myself as 'low femme,' FWIW :)
I also carry one of those GIANT PURSES. It usually has my computer, charger, kindle, extra book, notepad, wallet, snack, meds I might need, emergency tampons... I don't know how people possibly manage with just their pockets! :)
And I shamelessly carry my phone, which lives in the little pocket on the side of my GIANT BAG, into the bathroom with me. Though I do put it in my pocket when I have one.
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I have been reading this column at the Hairpin in my quest to figure out makeup for work, and while it occasionally has useful stuff, the writer doesn't have much sense of budget; like, she's frequently kind off-handedly recommending this brand of tinted moisturizer that's $42, as if there is nothing at all off-putting about that price. And she'll often recommend that people try several different things in that price range to see what works. Sorry, not going to happen! If I am going to spend $100+ on an experiment, it will be, like, a robotics kit or something.
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My purses have gotten more and more giant, especially now that I am taking public transportation... I don't actually like having a lot of stuff in it, but I like having the room just in case I want to! OMG. But I have so much random stuff in the pockets of my purse! (Notepad, discount movie tickets, pen, various IDs, wallet, nook, phone, inhaler, chapstick, nail clipper, bonus hair thing when I remember, emergency tampons, emergency tissue, keys, checkbook...) I like purses with a long strap so you can sling them.
I think I just get in the habit of carrying my phone everywhere now! But the chapstick thing, it is annoying! Right now I have three (purse, bedroom, work), but if I am spending a long time in the computer room, I get chapped lips because I keep forgetting to walk over to my purse and apply!
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Okay, I am kind of sad that I got a purse too small to carry a book in, though, now. Damn my poor planning!
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Yes, God I love the west coast. I think that you have put your finger on it - I think I want to be able to wear makeup, should I need it for a job interview or for a party or a costume or whatever. And I am currently not because I haven't worn it in almost twenty years and I just don't know how. So I should learn how, and own some, and then only wear it if I feel like wearing it.
Re: i think of myself as 'low femme,' FWIW :)
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I have read - I don't know this from personal experience, but I have read - that places like Sephora will give samples. So you might actually be able to try some of that stuff out for free. $42 still seems like a lot for moisturizer, though.
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I specifically got a small purse so that I would not end up filling the space. :)
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I am also ragey in reaction, if I felt like I was being pressured to be more femme I might cut my hair back to half an inch long. I can only do this because I don't feel pressured at all right now. It's nice.
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Stings a bit when you apply it, but by god it will not smear.
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Some "stay forever" lipsticks come in two parts, either an undercoat or the overcoat-type that Karen linked to. I would tend to advocate the undercoat approach, just because it hews to tradition.
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Cargo/painter's pants are my favorites, outside of work. Sadly, I am not a painter or a cargo...er, so they're not work-appropriate.
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(Also, these same men seem prone to pleated khakis, so it's not like they don't HAVE capacious pockets. But they still wear their tech gear on their belts, as if reaching into a pocket is too much effort. So it's possible that tech corridor men are those kind of men who park backwards in grocery store parking lots, so that they can just hop back in the car and pull out, tires squealing, like suburban Batmans.)
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